Today I sent off a few more query letters for my manuscript. I cringe slightly just typing that. Because it makes this process real. My manuscript is a real thing, and now it will either become a novel or it won’t. The stress of that feels unbearable.
Do you feel uncomfortable just reading the word S-T-R-E-S-S?
Because I do.
The query process doesn’t have to be stressful. It can be like anything else in life: a task, a moment, a series of steps.
But my brain feels frazzled stamping the “what ifs” all over the place.
“What if the agents don’t like it?”
“What if I spent all those years writing in vain?”
“What if I never get published?”
“What if I self publish and I should have done that all along?”
So, I search for peace.
The dining room now containing most of the plants that lived on our porch is bright and much greener than it was before. So, I pour my tea. And I get some yogurt. And I write in the dining room. I read the tweets posted by literary agents. I scan through websites that list small presses.
Sometimes I stare at the plants. (Ok, mostly, I stare at the plants.)
They’re not stressed. They just exist. They make oxygen and they color the world green. I breathe into that thought and I am calmer. Then, I stare out the window for a minute and I’m calmer, still.
And then I look up and realize the children have put their stuffed animals in the chair at this dining room table, and I’ve been having this stressful work morning with a couple of brainless, stuffed dogs and bunnies.
And I laugh.
And I grow still.
And I find peace.
What has brought you peace today??? Share away! I love hearing from you.