This week, LM1 learned he did not get something he applied for.
We worked on the application together, gave it thought, consideration, and energy, and then got the news.
No, thank you.
Watching disappointment on a child’s face is no easy task. LM1 was so excited at the prospect ahead of him, and then he was devastated. He set his intentions on something and BAM….nada.
As an adult, I’ve learned to do a number of things with disappointment:
- I can take it as a hint that I set my sites on the wrong thing
- I can practice finding the good mixed into the bad. Turn that frown upside down, sort of behavior
- I can “Little Engine That Could” the situation, and try-try again
Try rationalizing through any of these considerations with a 9-year-old. When you’re 9, there’s just tears. Our son cried for a while, until it was time for baseball practice and the game to follow.
Hubs and I tried explaining all the usual stuff: “Everyone misses something sometimes.” “We all get a ‘no’ from time to time.”
But LM1 internalized this and asked us if he didn’t get the opportunity because he’s a bad kid. This conjures memories of my own childhood. I assumed everything was my fault, for reasons I can’t explain. Now, my son seems to have inherited a terrible habit.
We assured our little man that he hadn’t done anything wrong. Sometimes, it’s just a “no” and it’s our job to react accordingly. Usually, we can turn a “no” into a “yes” for something else.
Say “yes” to a great baseball game, we said.
Say “yes” to trying hard and being a good friend, we said.
Say “yes to moving forward, even if it hurts a little to do so.
Soon, it was time to pick ourselves up and move on.
We got our man to his baseball game. He shook off his feelings of disappointment. I can’t say he found peace, but I have. And if I can find peace and mirror it back at him, I know that he’ll learn that we can find peace in anything. I remain in my seat of consciousness and help guide his way.
What brought you peace this week? Share the peace!
4 the Love of Peace 