meditation is only for monks

I had an interesting conversation with friends this week about meditation—mostly about why it can be so hard and wildly inaccessible. For years, I tried to meditate and failed spectacularly. I mean utter failure. The instructions always sounded simple enough: sit somewhere quiet, get comfortable, and think about nothing.

Nothing?

Who are these people? I wondered. Who has the time—or the brain—to sit still and do absolutely nothing?

I’m not a monk.

Shaving my head and retreating to a mountainside aren’t exactly on my vision board. And while I didn’t lose sleep over my inability to meditate (I also can’t dunk a basketball and lose 0% sleep over that one), I quietly assumed meditation just wasn’t for people like me.

Then a wise yoga teacher named Usha once told, “The more of a monkey mind you have, the more you benefit from meditation.”

She followed that gem up with, “the more you worry, the more you need meditation.”

I wanted to argue. Because every time I sat down to get quiet, my mind did the opposite. Sitting still didn’t calm me—it amplified everything. The worries. The noise. The endless loop of thoughts I couldn’t shut off. Meditation seemed to make things worse.

getting over the hump

Fast forward 20 years. I tried and failed to meditate, over and over again. Then, one day, without any warning, something finally clicked.

What changed?

I admitted to myself that I could not do this alone.

I accepted the fact that I was inept at finding a solution by myself. If God wanted us to operate alone, He would have given us all bubbles to live inside of. Instead, the world is brimming with life and humanity. We are social creatures, and we can learn from each other. That means, the world is also overflowing with wonderful teachers, and so, I decided to find one.

Usha, Lauren, Tessa, Bill, and Caitlin became incredible teachers for me.

While my yoga studios offered a plethora of wonderful teachers, I also looked to online tools, like Deepak Chopra’s Abundance Meditation. I realize this CD will feel like it’s a million years old, but you can also find this meditation for FREE as a podcast by CLICKING HERE.

Nowadays, there are apps upon apps that can guide you through meditation. I really like these:

1.) Guided Meditation podcast– $5.99 a month

2.) Boho Beautiful Yoga– YouTube channel has plenty of options!

3.) Goodful Channel– YouTube with free 5 minute meditations

Once I found the right teachers/resources/aides, I treated mediation like a skill I wanted to learn. I knew it would take time and practice to get better.

But instead of treating it like a skill I either had the competency for or not, I recognized meditation as a practice.

why meditate?

So, why did I want to learn how to meditate in the first place?

I’ve learned from yoga and meditation that everyone has a voice in her head, an inner critic, a roommate, so to speak. Some of us have a louder, busier voice than others.

I finally got tired of all the noise. And I sensed meditation was the way out of my head.

I knew meditation could be a path past the terrible things that circulate inside my head. And while I worried I couldn’t achieve a state of meditation, I felt that it was worth trying something that could make a difference in my life.

sharing resources

I like reading more and more about meditation and its benefits. I like learning that there is more to the benefits of meditation than just “feeling better.” There are real medical, neurological benefits to be spoken for. Check out some of the articles below for more information

1. Meditation and Its Mental and Physical Health Benefits
2. Neurobiological Changes Induced by Mindfulness and Meditation: A Systematic Review
3. Effects of a Neuroscience Based Mindfulness Meditation Program on Psychological Health

setting the stage

Like any good practice, I know now that I need to show up prepared. When I take my kiddos to wrestling or basketball or baseball, there’s a bag full of “the stuff” we need for practice:

• dry socks
• helmet or headgear
• water bottles
• sunscreen
• snacks
• appropriate footware

Preparing to meditate is no different. Over the years, I’ve tried a few different things to help get me settled. But here are a few of my favorites:

1.) Comfy chair. Some days I want to be reclined, in which case a standard yoga bolster is great. But if I want to sit upright, this chair is dreamy and helpful.

2.) Wonderful smells. I love a good candle. Lighting the candle somehow transforms my space and allows me to release a little tension before I even settle in. I think about lighting candles in church and their significance. I think candles simply give me peace. Ya’ll know my fave local candle maker is Maissa Luxury Candles. Check out her website HERE. My personal favorite scents are Eau de Mer, Lotus, and Suede.

3.) A warm blanket. Usually if I have a blanket in my lap, I’m golden. I love this company and recommend them highly, since they make beautiful things, and I love wrapping myself up in a beautiful thing.

4.) Comfy socks. If my toes are cold, I’m super distracted. Warm up with the right amount of snuggle. This time of year in the northeast, I like Alpaca or Wool. Check these out for some ideas.

Let me know how your meditation journey goes! I’m rooting for you and I’d love to hear of your successes!

Namaste, friends.