on turning 40
Apologies that I have fallen off the face of the earth when it comes to this blog. Our kiddos are all home for the summer, we went on vacation, and life has been a flurry of busy-ness. There’s nothing better than a full, joyful life, but it can eat into my writing time every now and again.
This month, I turn 40. It feels like a big deal. I’m excited. 40 feels like sort of, almost, perhaps a wisdom age. I can say that I don’t know everything, but I do know some things, now. I’ve found a sense of peace within myself about things I used to struggle with. I can let those things go and live a fuller life.
This #NoBuyChallenge has had something to do with that.
In fact, this challenge has played a much bigger role in my life than I expected. I have let go of the need to have things. (Not 100%, of course, but to a large degree.) AND, I’ve learned something about wanting and having….
brain power
Did you know that the wanting part of our brains is much more powerful than the liking part of our brains? That means we’re a really great species, designed to want and seek what we want. But actually liking something after the fact? The part of the brain stimulated after we actually get the thing that we wanted doesn’t quite fire up the same way. That means the best part of desiring something isn’t getting it. Once we have what we wanted, we’re only satiated for a little while.
I’ve come to know this. I’ve come to understand this. My wanting for things may feel powerful sometimes, but now I anticipate the hairy truth: the payoff is way less than worth my effort most of the time.
Unless there is real utility in the thing I want.
birthday treats
Because I’m turning 40, I got the ultimate cheat in this challenge: gifts.
Family showered me with gifts, and I had the opportunity to go shopping again. Let me reword that: I’ve always had the ability to go shopping. But this time around, I had a truly weightless freedom. I wasn’t spending my own money. I was spending money I was asked to spend.
But I have a new tool in my toolbox this time around: intention.
For me, the shopping experience has changed entirely.
This month, shopping was more careful. I was slow. I was less impulsive. AND…….real kicker……I didn’t buy any clothing.
the big change
I can’t believe it!!!
For my total love of clothing, there were other things I wanted to explore more than clothes. Our family was away on vacation abroad, and I wanted to find items that would remind me of our trip. I wanted to find special items I couldn’t possibly find at home.
I found a pair of sneakers that I’ve never seen anything like before, made by a company outside of the US. I found perfume and skincare that isn’t manufactured in the US. And I found postcards that were so beautiful, full of color and artistry and light, I knew I would frame them when I got home.
In one sense, it feels like a complete cheat. I do feel indulgent. But the feeling I’ve developed is an interesting one. I’ve never felt guilty or mindful about shopping before. Until now. I have changed, and I hope I stay this way.
There are only a few days more in the challenge…..I’m excited to see what they bring. And I wonder if you’ve experienced any unexpected changes in your own life.
Namaste, every day, friends!
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4 the Love of Peace 